I'm starting to get piss of with myself now.. I don't know how long should I continue with this life.. Simply just couldn't let go of something that has been over for fucking centuries ago.. Come on!! Get a life... He has moved on is now with another 'ONE'.. What the hell am I thinking? Why the fuck am I still feeling so fucking down? He's not mine anymore!! Aaarrgghhhh!!!!!
I can't believe choosing to come back and getting back with him is such a wrong wrong option for me.. I guess on the dya when I came back if I'm not in contact with him no matter how he msg me, I shouldn't and will not ended up with what I am now.. This is all my fault!!!
My heart is too numbed to accept another guy.. Neither is it ready for another new person to enter.. Or I should say cannot enter at all.. Perhaps his place in me is still strongly there.. No matter how much I've ignored it in days, months or centuries, I can never seem to get rid of it.. Hearing him being able to move on without problem, it does sounds great.. BUt at the same time, I feel the pain in my heart.. Very very deep cut.. I don't know why.. It's something which I can never explain till now..
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